Despite all the war
and religious turmoil and death around the world, the real issue is
homosexuality.
Which is most likely
the direct cause of all these atrocities.
It's 2015 and people
still have issues with gay marriages and gay rights.
Pretty much anything
gay is a problem, and should be fought against vigilantly.
Something which is strongly
encouraged and seen as well as enforced in strict religious communities particularly
in southern and/or Midwestern states.
But anyone with a
problem concerning all things gay needs to blame themselves because there
wouldn't be any gays if you people watched for the signs and triggers that
caused gayness.
You could prevent it
entirely if you knew what to look for and what to avoid.
Similar to cancer, one
can actually suddenly become gay or catch “The Gay” as it’s said in the world
today.
Contrary to what the
media tells you, you cannot catch The Gay by coming into contact with bodily
fluids or germs and such.
If a gay man sneezes on
you, you most likely won’t become gay, but scientists are still theorizing the
effects on such an event and studies are currently underway, however, nothing
has proven that one can catch The Gay in these specific situations so far.
With my help, you can
spot the signs and causes and prevent The Gay from infecting you or your loved
ones.
Especially your good,
heterosexual, god fearing children.
In about a year’s
time, we can put a severe dent in homosexual anomalies.
In about a decade of
following these methods, we can eliminate The Gay entirely.
Here are the signs and
causes to watch for and avoid at all costs lest you become a homosexual.
My question and answer
section will put you on the straight path and as far away from queer thinking
as one can get.
When you pet a dog, do
you go with the grain or against it?
Most homosexuals go
with the grain and that could cause you to become ill with The Gay as well.
Petting a dog by going
with the grain generates static electricity in your palms causing gay cells to
form. These cells formed by the electric shocks attack the heterosexual part of
your brain and kill off straight cells the way cancer cells kill off healthy
cells in your body. The Gay is very much a cancer in its own right and the
American Cancer Society is working hard to include The Gay in its cancer
compendium as well as striving to educate doctors on how to fight the disease.
Do you wear eyeglasses
regularly?
Most homosexuals wear eyeglasses
too. Switch to contact lenses or get Lasik or you will develop symptoms and will
start preferring same sex relations. You’ll notice by a sudden surge of
perspiration whenever triggers occur, such as muscular oiled men walking past
you. Eventually you will be unable to fight the urges and will be fully
infected with The Gay.
Do you sleep on your
back or on your side?
Nintety percent of
people who side-sleep become homosexuals by the age of eighteen..
Sleeping on your back
has about a forty five percent chance of homosexual conversion.
The safest way to
sleep is on your stomach.
Studies show that pointing
your anus upwards means you have nothing to hide and are less likely to engage
in homosexual sex or contract The Gay during sleep.
It may very well be too late for many children at this point, but there is always sexual reorientation through our religious leaders and anti-homogay homeopathic medication.
It may very well be too late for many children at this point, but there is always sexual reorientation through our religious leaders and anti-homogay homeopathic medication.
Do you wear a wristwatch?
Eighty percent of
people who wear watches have a sixty percent chance of becoming fifty percent
homosexual which means you could potentially become what is known as a “bi-sexual”
but ultimately, you will still have The Gay despite your desire for enjoying both
sex organs.
As an analogy, eating
meat once a year disqualifies you from being a vegetarian just as having
vaginal intercourse doesn’t negate allowing penises into your body.
Do you have a telephone
landline?
Most homosexual DO NOT
have a landline and use cell phones exclusively.
Cell phone radio waves,
like static electricity, can kill straight brain cells causing you to develop
homosexual tendencies and eventually, The Gay. These particular wave effects
are much more prevalent with Apple brand cellular phones, studies have shown.
Most homosexuals have been
known to own Apple phones or Apple wifi devices as they tend to become genetically
predisposed to wanting to buy this brand once The Gay redesigns their genetic
make-up.
Do you wear bowties?
This one is important,
especially if you are an African American male.
Caucasian men are
thirty percent more likely to develop The Gay from wearing bowties but African
Americans are nintey percent more likely due to the thickness of their big
black necks and the tightness of the bowties.
Every time you wear a
bowtie as a black male, you are one step closer to same sex anus games.
Do you enjoy phallus
shaped foods?
The more of these kinds of foods you eat, the more it is clear that you have an insatiable craving for male penis in your mouth. It’s a proven science and you can Google that to corroborate this information. There is absolutely zero evidence indicating the opposite. Stop eating these food items immediately.
The more of these kinds of foods you eat, the more it is clear that you have an insatiable craving for male penis in your mouth. It’s a proven science and you can Google that to corroborate this information. There is absolutely zero evidence indicating the opposite. Stop eating these food items immediately.
Here is a small sample
list of food items that promote anti-gay pheromones within your body:
HI-C juices
Gogurt brand yogurt
Elio’s Pizza
General Foods
International Coffee
Muscle Milk
Orbit Gum
Hillshire Farms Turkey
Pepperidge Farm Milano
cookies.
There are many others,
but incorporating these kinds of foods into your diet will ensure a long life
devoid of same sex activity.
Follow this guide
closely and I guarantee you will never experience the horror of walking in on
your loved ones performing homosexual acts on other infected teenagers and
thereby upsetting our glorious gods.
Peace be with you and
may we one day stomp The Gay out of existence by the grace of our deities.